I love reading about Moses.  He was a bigger mess-up than me, and yet GOD used him to do amazingly huge things!  It’s hopeful reading.  This week I read about when he was called by GOD through a burning bush.  It coincided nicely with putting our youth staff together and assigning duties to each one.  Some of the jobs we assigned were a little beyond what each person would normally do.  Stretching like that often brings doubts about whether or not we can handle it.  Moses had a lot of doubts and let GOD know it too!

The first remark Moses said in response to GOD was “here I am.”  It shows he had a relationship with the Almighty and recognized HIS voice and HIS call.  There was no question about it.  It was GOD’s call, and he answered. 

So GOD goes into the reason HE’s calling – HIS people hurt and it’s time to send in the troops – or trooper.  But Moses has other ideas.  He balks.  “I am not a great man,” he says.  And how many of us had the same kind of doubts when nudged by GOD into something new.  “I’m not good enough for this new thing.  I have nothing to offer.  Why me?  You must be wrong.”  (Wow – some ego to tell GOD that HE must be wrong!)  But GOD reassures us and answers (rebuts) every doubt these questions address.  So Moses asks other questions.

He asks “What do I tell them?”  He’s saying ‘I’m not smart enough for this, I have nothing of worth to say, I have so many questions of my own and none of the answers – how can I tell them anything.’  Ever feel like this?  I know I have (but then, I’m the insecure type who really likes hangin’ out in the background.)  And again, GOD was faithful to answer Moses then with detailed explanation, and HE will be faithful even now.

But that didn’t stop Moses’ doubts.  I think he even starts whining.  “What if they don’t believe me?”  (I can almost see GOD shaking HIS head and sighing with exasperation at this point.)   Poor Moses!  He thinks he won’t be accepted or trusted.  But GOD again provides HIS servant with exactly what he needs to answer his doubts.  HE outlines what to say and gives Moses miraculous power that would convince even hard-hearted skeptics.  And yet, Moses still has a problem!

“I’m not a good speaker,” he complains (he’s sounding younger and younger, like a pouting child now.)  Some people say that he may even have had a stutter (that ‘slow-of-speech’ thing) but I think it was mostly a lack of confidence.  He’s afraid he won’t think of the right things to say, which is a fear so many of us have that even Jesus had to tell us not to worry about it.  Now, at this point, even GOD is getting angry with HIS whining, complaining, and doubting child, but HE again outlines everything Moses needs to say and do while in Egypt.  And finally, Moses is out of doubts and questions.

But because he still feels too small in his heart he begins to beg “Please send someone else!”  All the details GOD lays out for Moses, and he still argues with GOD!  He begs to get out of the duty, the calling.  I think I may have done this just yesterday (okay, maybe not, but even knowing what GOD plans for me the way Moses did, I still try to talk GOD out of it sometimes.  Have you?)  So GOD sends Aaron to help.  That’s it – it’s all settled.  Moses just needs to tell his family that they are leaving for Egypt to face-off with Pharoah.

So when he goes and talks to his father-in-law, he kind of asks his permission.  “Let me go to Egypt.”  I think if Jethro had expressed one doubt himself, one iota of hesitation, Moses would have stayed.  Thank GOD for providing faithful people around us in our times of doubt and struggle!  Jethro says simply, “Go.  I wish you well.”  That’s it – it’s time to pack.

Our youth staff was receptive to the duties we assigned.  If they were hesitant, they were quiet about it (maybe they are arguing directly with GOD, I don’t know.)  But it’s such a relief to know that GOD welcomes our expressions of doubt.  HE loves when we turn to HIM with our worries.  And HE makes a way, which changes us.  We’re better off for the struggle.

I say all this as a prelude to my own story.  GOD asked my family to drop everything and move 600 miles to do a work in a place we’d already left.  We were called to go back so HE could do something wonderful.  And I argued (we can do good things here too.)  And I said I don’t even know these people anymore.  They won’t accept what I say.   They will only remember the immature me of ten years ago.  I put up roadblocks (well, we can’t afford it right now.  There’s no way we can move!)  But GOD had an answer for everything.  HE provided an answer on each doubt, each detail, and removed each roadblock I put up.  And I knew.   Now that we’re here, watching the hand of GOD moving, and seeing the lives changed because we are here, I can’t believe I argued or doubted at all.  I feel foolish.  GOD’s power is great, HIS plans are perfect, and while I will probably argue with HIM again, I will let HIM win a little sooner.  HE’s gonna win anyway, right?  HE’s GOD!